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a scientific step by step analysis of the cyclical process of the things i do that make me the biggest asshole ever and why i should not be allowed to have feelings for anyone ever

  1. like person “why is he so perfect and clean and well dressed and why won’t he just love me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” also involves listening to adele and making the D: face irl all the time and throwing my computer and running until i die every time luv quotes appear on my dash
  2. i don’t need a man to make it happen i get off being free etc pretend i am over it which is about as productive as attempting to dissolve 60g silver phosphate in 10ml of water (very unproductive) this works for like 2 hours and then step 1 happens again until
  3. person starts to like me “oh……. but since when does his hair look like that wtf o_O” start avoiding person and pointing out all their flaws and act like a general asshole because suddenly commitment has become a reality omfg what is my problem why EVERY TIME
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